Weird Things in My Kindle TBR

Weird Things in My Kindle TBR

Book hoarding. YESSS.

I’ve had a Kindle (other ereaders are also available, apparently), in one form or another, for at least eight years or so. My original Kindle, in fact, I sent to my dad when I ‘upgraded’ to a Kindle Fire. That Kindle Fire has now become a Spotify machine which crashes regularly, and the Kindle Fire that followed (which has the worst battery life imaginable and crashes regularly) has been relegated to use for YouTube workout videos, replaced by a Kindle Paperwhite. Meanwhile, Dad’s still using that that first Kindle. I kind of messed that one up.

Anyhow, I did one of those “I have so much stuff on here, what is it all?” things (of course, I know there are at least six versions of the WIP, but there is so much more on my Kindle. So much more).

Friends, do not ask this question lightly.

I thought that, other than the many copies of various versions of the WIP, that there were certain things I could expect:

  • Several Learn French books because I have good intentions, mostly never opened because I have terrible follow through.
  • A large collection of classics, because as above. Plus they’re free.
  • A very large collections of BookBub buys, because when I first found Bookbub I bought something off almost every email. Every daily email. Some were free, some weren’t. A fairly large proportion of them are unopened, and a reasonable portion of the opened ones I never finished.
  • A substantial collection of books I actually bought and read.

So, yes, I was prepared for those.

However, some things I was not prepared for.

Allow me to present:

A Tour Through the Weird Books I Thought I Needed.

 

Decorative Napkin Folding for Beginners.

“Napkins are easy to fold into ingenious shapes and add a tough of festivity to any dinner. Whether you use paper or cloth, a napkin folded into a delightful shape is a welcome way to start a meal.”

I do not know why I thought I needed this. Many years ago I did a combination of cooking and stewardessing aboard small boats, and did on occasion need to fold a napkin, although mostly my partner at the time took care of that sort of thing. This was many years before Kindle, though, and it is not an aspect of the job I miss.

However, if I ever decide to buy a dining table and have a dinner party, I will be able to fold paper or material napkins into festive shapes. Which is handy. (And, apparently, my guests “will have as much fun trying to figure out how you did it as you did in the making.” Good times.)

 

Taste: The Story of Britain Through its Cooking.

“In this involving history of the British people, Kate Colquhoun celebrates every aspect of our cuisine from Anglo-Saxon feasts and Tudor banquets, through the skinning of eels and the invention of ice cream, to Dickensian dinner-party excess and the growth of frozen food.”

To be fair, this actually sounds quite interesting, but I don’t know why I thought I’d read it. It’s one of those books I look at in a bookshop, think it sounds clever, then put it down again. The odds of me learning about the history of Britain through the medium of food are – wait. Hang on, I just realised the attraction. Okay, I won’t delete this one.

 

Don’t Throw It, Grow It!: 68 windowsill plants from kitchen scraps.

“Don’t throw out your kitchen scraps — grow them! Discover how you can transform leftover pomegranate seeds, mango pits, and dried bits of gingerroot into thriving plants. From the common carrot to the exotic cherimoya, you’ll be amazed at the gardening possibilities hidden in the foods you eat.”

Delusions of grandeur. I don’t even know what a cherimoya is. And I can’t keep actual plants from garden centres alive, so I have doubts about my ability to coax life from garden scraps. It seems that, at times, I see myself as having a domestic goddess side. I’m pretty certain this is incorrect.

 

How to Stay Sane: The School of Life, Book 6.

“There is no simple set of instructions that can guarantee sanity.”

I can’t help but feel this book is poorly named. “How to Possibly Stay a Little Sane” might fit more with that blurb. Not that I’ve read it, because apparently this was not a high priority read for me. I’d also like to know why I didn’t start with Book 1. That might have been something handy, like “How to Adult”.

 

Writing a Novel & Getting Published for Dummies.

“If you’ve always wanted to write that great novel, but never knew where to start, look no further! Taking you step by step from concept to contract, this book provides the tools you need to tell your story with skill and approach agents and publishers with confidence.”

Ahahahahahaha.

Well, we always hope there’s a secret, right? A magic formula that we just have to discover? A secret code, a hidden map, a… book for dummies?

 

I also discovered an astonishing amount of cosy mysteries, both read and not, as well as a perfectly ridiculous number of zombie books. Apparently I’ve been searching for the perfect zombie-cosy mystery crossover for quite some time.

I won’t mention the large assortment of books that I actually already own in hard copy, though…

 

Correct.

 

What about you? Have you made any mystifying finds on your Kindle (substitute ereader of choice here)?

6 Replies to “Weird Things in My Kindle TBR”

  1. I CAN COMPLETELY RELATE! Years and years (and years) ago, I got the newest Kindle (which, I think, is now referred to as the paperwhite . . . looks like newsprint, no glare, read it outside in bright sunlight, etc.). The big deal with the new one that year was that it had 3G capability and was beta-ing the ability to connect online . . . which should now give you precise perspective on its age. I still have it, and can read on it, but once I’m in a book, I can’t leave it without waiting several minutes for it to change screens to go to the homepage. It’s basically useless, which is sad. But when I found it recently and decided to cull some titles, I was astounded that I had literally thousands of books on it. Like you, I got a bunch of classics (free, good intentions), a bunch of “top 100 free” books that were basically garbage and deleted upon reading the first third or so of each book, and titles that I’m not sure what I was thinking when I downloaded them. I got rid of probably 90% of what was on it (had to go directly to Amazon to do it, since changing screens on the device was out of the question) and actually felt like I could breathe easier, lol.

    1. I think that was probably the same Kindle I had – and that my dad’s still using! Although I don’t think mine even had wifi connectivity, let alone 3G…

      I really need to clean out my Amazon bookshelves. There’s SO MUCH on there that I’ll never read, But I seem unable to clear them out. Just in case I’m never allowed to buy a book again, maybe?

  2. When I got my Kindle, I was eager to add books in my Kindle library. So, there are a lot of free classics, self help books and cookbooks (Paleo diet, Keto recipes etc) which I have never opened. This post of your reminds me to clean up my Kindle library. 😀

    1. I have a few cookbooks too, and I don’t know why – The SO has a huge collection and I don’t think I’ve ever opened one. I always search for the recipes I want online!

  3. He says you can have it back if you want. Cover is a bit tatty but still working fine. Bought him a new one but battery life dreadful.

    1. I wouldn’t dare! That’s a collector’s item these days. It’ll probably outlive three more of my new Kindles 😉

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